Holidays can bring mixed emotions. Follow these tips to make them more joyous.

1. Keep your regular routine: A change in routine can lead to additional stress. Try to exercise at your usual time, go to meetings that you normally go to, and stick to as normal a diet as you possibly can.

2. Think moderation: While it may be easy to drink and eat too much at parties and special dinners, try not to overindulge with food and/or alcohol. Remember, eating and drinking may feel like they temporarily “ease the pain” of the holiday blues, but they can also lead to feelings of guilt.

3. Be realistic, and try not to expect the “ideal” holiday: So many of us have an idealized version of what the holidays should be like and are disappointed when they don’t live up to those expectations. Try to be realistic. Remember, nobody has a perfect holiday or the perfect family.

4. Stay connected: Make time to spend with friends and family who value you. If they don’t live close by, call them for a “reality check” or some “grounding”. Remember to ask for support if you need it.

5. Throw guilt out the window: Try not to put unreasonable pressure on yourself to be happy, to rejoice, or even to enjoy the holidays. Likewise, try not to overanalyze your interactions with others. Give yourself a break this holiday season.

6. Don’t be alone if you don’t want to be: If you anticipate spending the holidays alone, try to volunteer somewhere like in a soup kitchen, with children in group homes, or the elderly in various facilities. People will appreciate you and it may lift your spirits to bring them joy, but more importantly, you’ll have company.

7. Focus on today, not yesterday: There’s something about being with family and old friends that makes us become who we were and not who we are. When you find yourself reverting to old childhood patterns with family members, try to walk away for a minute and remember who you are now. Also remember that it’s not necessary to play the same role as you did when you were younger, even if others are encouraging you to do so. If there is someone at the get-together who knows what you are like today, be sure to reach out to them and draw them into the interactions to ground you.

8. Ask for help: Holidays are often a time people attempt to take on too much or do too much on their own. It’s okay to ask for help from family and friends. Whether for decorating, shopping, cooking, or a shoulder to lean on, just ASK.

9. Be good to yourself: If you’re feeling blue, pamper yourself. Do what feels good, and do what you want to do. Try to take a walk or spend time alone if that’s what you want. Remember, this is your holiday too, and you can be there for yourself just like you try to be for everyone else.

The holidays only come once a year and only last for a few weeks. If you follow these 9 tips, you might just find this year to be more joyful and less stressful.

Have a peaceful holiday season!

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